


smoke and mirrors

by goldenheure



Category: Infinity Train (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, my first time writing nsfw, they had sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:20:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26386309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldenheure/pseuds/goldenheure
Summary: au where Simon survives. the apex’s former leaders try to patch up their relationship.
Relationships: Simon Laurent/Grace Monroe
Comments: 6
Kudos: 23





	1. cellophane

**Author's Note:**

> please don’t flame me it’s my first time writing nsfw!

Grace sat up, gasping. Her eyes darted around. Simon was fast asleep. Simon’s alive. Not dissolved by a Ghom as the children watched. Alive, breathing. Still very angry, but alive. She fell back asleep, comforted by this.

When she awoke again, Simon was awake. Grace reached out and grabbed his wrist, prompting a confused grunt from him. She wanted to feel his pulse.

”You’re.. here. Alive. With me. Not melted.” She said, trying to convince herself.

”Uh.. yes. Why would I be.. melted? What kind of weird dream did you have?” He asked. He seemed normal. Before he wheeled Tuba and lost himself. He still had his “post-takeover” outfit on. Grace couldn’t deny that it suited him well. Very well. The jacket over the shoulders, hair in his face, and stubble combo really made him look powerful.

Grace was tired of being powerful. In had real life, she lacked attention, but had endless power. Money is power. On the train, she had endless attention and power. Numbers are power. Being the decision maker for so many feral children took a toll on her. She was only 18.

She blinked, bringing herself out of her thoughts. 

“So. You tried to overthrow me, huh? Why didn’t you wheel me?”

Simon looked away.

”Right. That. I realized that it would’ve been my stupidest mistake yet. You went against me, but without you, none of us would survive.”

”So you kept me to, what, babysit you and your kingdom of kids?” She retorted.

”What? No. I couldn’t kill my best friend. A null, sure. But you? Grace? No.” He shook his head. “You know what? Let’s talk it out. I know where we should go.”

She quirked a brow. “Is this a trap?”

Simon huffed. “My god, no! I’m not going to kill you, okay? Scouts’ honor.” He even did the salute.

”Fine. Okay. Let’s go.”

———

After heading out of the mall car, the duo arrived at an adjacent car. Simon opened the door, gesturing for her to enter.

What she found was mesmerizing. A lush garden that rivaled the world’s finest palace gardens. Bushes bloomed with vibrant flowers and giant plants stood towering above them. The sun beat down, providing warmth, but not too much. It was idyllic.

”Woah.” Grace squeaked out.

”Welcome to the garden car. Uncreative name. I know. I’d found it and thought it was the perfect spot to just chill.” Simon said, proud of his discovery. “Shall we?” He extended his hand for her to take.

”We shall.” She took his hand. She noticed his number drop. Only a couple of digits, but it was a start.

”Onward!” He yelled. The two walked past rows of hedges and fountains, eventually arriving in a courtyard. There was a bench, complete with extremely expensive-looking cushions. Grace’s mom would’ve called it “gauche.” Grace called it comfortable.

Simon sat down and gestured for her to do the same, patting next to himself. Grace did so, letting out a huff.

The two sat silent. After an awkward beat, Simon spoke.

”I’m sorry. I really am. I know it doesn’t matter. What I’ve done is beyond apology. But I still think you deserve to hear it.” He said. His blue eyes looked especially oceanic as tears welled in them, spilling over down his cheeks. His Apex symbol smeared—his lipstick wasn’t particularly transfer-proof.

”Well, thank you for the apology. I don’t know if I’ve forgiven you. I may never know. You hurt people, Simon. You hurt Hazel, and Tuba, and Amelia. And most of all, you hurt me.” She said, beginning to cry as well. “Do you know what it’s like to feel as if you’re responsible for literally everything around you? To protect everyone and ensure no one gets hurt, even at your own detriment? We’re kids, Simon. I’m a kid. I shouldn’t be caring for children and watching people die. I should be.. I don’t know, probably doing my makeup and singing along to boy bands.”

By the end of her monologue, she was shaking. It felt good to get it out.

”Why do you feel responsible for everything? You know I could’ve bore responsibility as well.” 

“Ohhh, no. Don’t you put this on me, Laurent. I am not the guilty party here.” She seethed. He knew he was wrong for that, but he couldn’t deny that the way he said his surname made him feel things.

Things they never discussed. Fluttery sparkly gravity-defying things.

”I’m in love with you, Grace Monroe.”


	2. exist for love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> maybe.. starting to get steamy.. 😳 anger + mutual pining + friends to enemies to lovers = maximum tension

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> basically   
> grace: *valid anger-based argument*  
> simon: ooh you wanna kiss me so bad

_“I’m in love with you, Grace Monroe.”_

That hung in the air. Simon quickly clapped his hands over his mouth and rapidly shook his head as if his brain were an Etch-a-Sketch and he had to clear his board of thoughts.

Grace just looked at him. Her own brain was doing a lot of calculations. Love? Like, romantic? Him? The romantic part of her felt overjoyed. She’d felt the same. The rational part of her felt angered. The skeptical part of her felt paranoid. Was this a trap? A manipulative ploy on his part to make her let her guard down?

“Why?” She asked, voice soft. If she spoke louder she might explode.

”What do you mean, why?”

”I mean, why would you say that? Now? Of all times? You had to say that now, when our situation is at its lowest and after you tried to kill me? After all the pain you’ve caused? That’s a shitty thing to do to a girl.” She said, raising her voice. Her voice was like steel. Her voice tended to crack when yelling, but now, she was unwavering.

Simon was quiet, his eyes scanning her face. Then, he spoke up. 

“Don’t lie to me. You feel the same way. You’re deflecting.” He said. He knew it. Hell, he’d seen it, even.

”That’s besides the point! I’m serious. No matter my feelings, it’s not right. You know this is, like, the worst time.”

”Sure. You’re right. But you’re still skirting the topic.” He replied. He watched as her Apex symbol grew. Or was it blush?

“Christ! Stop it! Please. If I’m your leader, then you need to listen to me.”

Simon thought. “What if I want to be the leader for once?”

”Be my guest! I’m sick of it! I’ve been expected to lead everything for god knows how long. And now you’re just making it worse!” She yelled. She’d reached her breaking point. The tears came out like a burst dam. They streamed down her face, hot and shameful. She’d never liked to be seen so vulnerable. For once, she needed to.

Simon was silent as her body racked with sobs. He didn’t know what to do. He knew he messed up big time, though.

He did, however, notice a bush next to the bench. Violets.

 _Her favorite,_ he thought. So he plucked it, took her hand, and gently placed it in her palm.

That distracted her. She looked at the flower in puzzlement, then up at Simon.

”You told me they were your favorite. We were, like, 12. Silly trivia game, but you told me that. I’d never forgotten.”

She blinked a few times, then laughed. It evolved from a giggle to a laugh to a body-shaking cackle.

”Oh, my god! Simon! You are such a hopeless romantic, wow! I knew you were a fan of the dramatic, but my lord!” 

He turned red and frowned.

”Yeah. I am. So what? I’m sensitive. Isn’t that a good trait to have?”

”No, no, you’re right, it’s just.. wow. Like, okay, Mr. Darcy!”

He clicked his tongue.

”Oh, please. I know you love it.”

”Do I? I didn’t know you could wax poetic.” 

He sat up straight.

”Is that a challenge? You want me to word vomit purple prose? That’s what you’re into?” He said.

”Not particularly. I just feel like you deserve to be annoyed. A sliver of how you’ve made me feel.”

”Aw, Grace. You ruined it. I was gonna be all sappy.”

She rolled her eyes. “Ugh. Go ahead. Just know I’m still really pissed.”

”I know. You’re hot when you’re angry.” He took her chin with his index finger and thumb and moved her head to face him. He took her hands in his and made eye contact. Grace’s heart pounded. So many conflicting emotions.

”Grace Monroe. My Grace. You have set my heart aflame. When you say my name, it’s like an ocean in my veins-.”

She cut him off, laughing. “Did.. did you just plagiarize Aurora?!”

He scrunched up his mouth in frustration. ”I didn’t mean to!”

”Aw, well, you’re hot when you’re angry, too.”

———

They kissed. The transition from a petty argument with a boiling undercurrent to their lips meeting was jarring. But then again, so was every aspect of, well, everything in their lives.

They pulled away. Grace panted and Simon had a pathetically dopey grin.

”Holy shit.” Grace whispered shakily.

”I know. I want to do that again. And again. My god. I want that for all of eternity.” Simon replied.

”Me, too.”

Their lips collided again. It was obvious how desperate they were, that they’d waited and yearned, ached for this for years.

All Grace could do was giggle, mostly out of disbelief. Simon moved his hand from his side to press against the small of her back. She gasped.

”Oh.”

”Oh?” Simon asked teasingly. He was the leader now.

She leaned deeper into the kiss. Neither were experts at making out, but they’d watched enough chick flicks to guess.

Simon stopped and moved his mouth downward, down her chin and to the top of her throat.

He’d never noticed just how delicate her throat was. Her body in general was lithe, the body of a dancer. As if she were sculpted out of sea foam and mother-of-pearl and abalone and placed in a seashell. A being so above him, so beyond him. Bones of marble and skin of flower petals. She would’ve made gods weep.

Yet here she was, and she was reciprocating. Why she didn’t kill him was confusing, but he wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

”I love you, Grace.”

”I love you too, Simon.”


	3. cherry wine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe update time.. might get.. actually nsfw? 😳 skip this if you don’t want to read actual sex!

The duo looked at each other. Their flushed faces made them look like a pair of cherries.

”Sooo... um.” Grace said, pursing her lips. Awkward silence filled the air.

”Yeah.” Simon deeply exhaled. “Grace, I..” He started his sentence but couldn’t finish it. Words failed him.

They sat in the quiet, both wanting to say something and nothing at all.

”I think we should work toward getting off the train.” Grace spoke up. Simon looked at her, head tilted in confusion.

”Why? We’d just be stuck with our old lives, the ones the train tried to get us away from.” He said.

”Well, sure. But, what if we get off the train together? We could stay together. Just the two of us against the world.” She sighed whimsically.

”Yeah. We.. we could. We could get an apartment. And a cat.” He said, trying to fight off memories of Samantha. “Not.. that kind of cat. A real one. One that just meows and doesn’t abandon you.”

”Sure. We’ll get a normal cat. And a cute little kitchen with an island so we can have room to cook.” Grace agreed, already imagining their life together.

Simon’s face turned red again as he faced away from her. “And.. do other things. Not.. um. In the kitchen, per se. Just.. you know..!” He managed to squeak out, embarrassed as all get out.

Why did his brain do that to him? He’d be a liar if he said he didn’t think about her like _that._ Like she loved him and like she wanted him to.. to touch her. Late at night, when insomnia had him in its grasp, Simon would occasionally let his mind wander. Imagining gently lifting up her shirt and undoing her bra—if she even wore one, he didn’t know—and she’d smile and sigh and unbutton his pants AND—!

He shook himself out of his haunting reverie. God. Behind his eyelids, she was a mirage of salvation and love and everything good. But she’d never see him as anything but truly a deplorable creature, right?

”Si, you okay, space cadet? Making a mental mood board of future area rugs?” Grace said, laughing a bit at her own joke.

”Uh. Y-yeah. Something like that. Um. Sorry.” He was shaking like a leaf. 

“Are you sure? You seem upset. Was it about.. her?”

”Who, Sam? No. God, no. I never think about her. Only you. I think that’s my problem. I think about you so much and I imagine _things_ and then I get so upset knowing it’s impossible and I just.. ugh! FUCK!” He yelled, hugging himself in upset. His mind playing hopscotch from having sex with his best friend to intrusive thoughts about how he’s a subhuman monster always amazed him.

”What’re you going on about? You’re really tightly wound. I feel like you need to release all that.”

He buried his face in his hands. “Stop with the innuendos, damnit.” He cried, muffled.

”Huh? Ugh. Men. No, I mean—wait. Simon. NO. YOU MEAN, you..?” She asked, mouth agape.

”Yeah. I.. yeah. For years. But.. but it’s only gotten really bad this past year.”

Grace was now a similar bright red. She couldn’t deny similar feelings, but to know it was reciprocal, that shocked her. It was like a baseball bat to the chest, but in a good way. 

“Simon. I think I get what you’re saying. And I mean, I’m not going to say I don’t feel the same. We obviously have some unresolved feelings and desires. But.. ugh. I don’t know, I’ve never dealt with this before. The closest I got was when I got to first base with Tommy Chang in 7th grade.”

He laughed. “Maybe we ought to, I don’t know, not proceed while in a garden?”

”Agreed. Let’s go home for now.”

———

They made it back to the mall car. It was empty. Not surprising, as all the kids usually slept around then. Thank god. They walked up to Simon’s room, giggling and padding around. Simon unlocked his door and gingerly closed it and re-locked it.

”So. We’re.. here. Home sweet home.” Grace said, flopping onto his bed. Simon sat beside her.

”Mhm. I know that over the coming days, we’ll have lots to figure out. The kids, their numbers, what to do with me.”

Grace raised an eyebrow and looked at him. “Are you asking to be punished, Laurent?”

He, again, turned red. They were doing a lot of that lately. “Not like that! I meant, like, how can I atone for what I’ve done? Grace, I killed someone! A null, but still. Hazel will never forgive me.”

”Yeah, probably not. I think that if you apologize and then show you’ve learned, it’ll help heal. Both the Apex, and you. But enough about that. I don’t want to think about that. I don’t want to be in charge. I want you to be in charge.” She sat up and scooted over next to him. They were so close.

”What do you mean?”

”Like.. you know. What you think about. I want that. I want you.” She whispered, leaning in to kiss him. _She wanted him,_ he thought. _He could do that._

”Okay. But, you have to let me know if you feel uncomfortable. We need to be operating on the same wavelength. This is all about trust and caring for each other.” He said, and Grace nodded in agreement.

”Look at you. Consent is sexy. That’s really hot.” She kissed him again as he leaned into her, slowly moving his mouth down her jaw and onto her neck. She gasped.

”Ah! Didn’t expect that. Your stubble. It tickles.” She said, laughing.

”Sorry. Is it an issue?”

”No. I quite like it. It’s rugged, and imperfect. It fits you.”

He gave a thoughtful hum to that as he moved his hands down to her waistline. God. He’d dreamed of this moment. He worked her shirt off as she raised her arms to assist.

No bra. Huh. He felt his brain short-circuit. There she was, in his room, on his bed. Topless. Holy shit.

”Wow.” He said in a strained whisper.

”Is that a good ‘wow?’” She asked, feeling a bit self-conscious.

”Yeah! I just.. I don’t know. I didn’t think I’d get this far.”

”Well, keep going. You’re the leader, after all.” She said. “Do you need my help? Just guide my hands.”

He gently took her hands and put them at his fly, and she quickly undid his pants. Maybe a bit too quickly. She was excited. 

He shimmied out of his pants and kicked them over into the corner in a pile along with her shirt. He slipped his shirt off and tossed it there as well.

Grace pulled off her sweatpants. Today was a lazy day.

The two of them felt very awkward and exposed. 

“So. Um. What now? Do we.. continue?! Until we.. YOU KNOW, _FINISH?!_ ” Simon yelled, feeling completely lost. His brain was oatmeal. His only knowledge of sex was from science class, rumors from friends, and the occasional internet search.

”I mean, we don’t have to. Simon, if you’re not ready, that’s okay. You know I’m always here.”

”NO! No. Sorry. I just, I am ready. I think. I’ve wanted this so, so badly. More than anything.”

”Okay, then.” Grace said. She moved over and began moving his underwear down. His heart pounded.

”I’m so sorry your first time is with an idiot man child who tried to kill you.” He said. He was afraid if he actually took in the sight of her with her hands moving to touch him, he’d wake up.

”Trust me. There’s no one I’d rather do it with.” She replied, tossing his underwear aside. He was totally naked. Oh god.

”Hey. Is it okay if I.. um. You know. Actually touch it?” She asked.

”Yeah! Go ahead.” He said. He was going to not only bust, but combust.

”Hang on a sec.” She shifted herself onto her knees from a sitting position and took off her underwear as well. “Wait! Condoms. Do we have any?”

He nodded. The kids had found some in a superstore car. They thought they were balloons. Simon promptly confiscated the box after the horrifying realization. “In my drawer.”

She gave a laugh as she grabbed one from his nightstand. “What, were you saving these?”

”Maybe.” He said, taking it and opening it. He slipped it on. “And as for lubricant, I have some Vaseline in there too. Before you ask, it’s for my elbows. They get ashy.”

”Hmm. Sure. I’m not stupid. We’re not adults. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.” She said, grabbing the tub and scooping some out.

”Oh! Would you like me to put it on? Maybe it’ll help you ease into it?”

”Good idea.” He gripped the bedsheets in anticipation. She gently took him in her hand and rubbed up and down. Her hand was warm. Warmer than he’d expected, but not unwelcome.

”O-oh. That feels.. amazing.” He moaned.

”That’s the goal. Here. I’m going to move over onto your lap, and you can put it in, if you want. Or you could just touch me. Again. Up to you.”

He wanted to do so much to her, but he paced himself. He lowered his hands to meet her center. She looked exactly how he expected, yet it was still like opening a present. He gently brushed a thumb over her clit. 

“Oh! Wow. That’s nice.” She cried. “More of that. I like that!”

”You’re sounding flustered, Monroe.” He felt confident enough to try playing up the cocky persona. “Looks like I have more power over you than you’d like to admit. But you can’t deny it. You want me so bad, Grace. You can’t hide your feelings. You want me to take you and do whatever I want, don’t you? You dream of what I’d feel like inside you.”

Grace looked up at him, wide-eyed. “That’s hot. Please. I’m a fan.”

He gingerly slipped two fingers inside of her and used his thumb to move her clit.

”I know you are, doll. You’re so good to me. Look at you.” He said, moving his fingers as she writhed in pleasure.

”Simon, I love you so much. Wow.”

”I love you too, princess. I’m so happy you’re mine and I’m yours.” His hair has slipped out of its ponytail and brushed her face. 

Suddenly, she tensed up and moaned as waves of pleasure wracked her body. Grace swore she saw stars.

”OH MY GOD.” She yelled. “That was.. ohhh. My. God.” She panted as Simon moved to sit next to her. 

“Hang on. I’ll return the favor.” She sat up and eagerly wrapped her hands around his member. He gave a soft gasp. Grace moved her hands up and down, reveling in his expressions. His chest rose and fell quicker and he would softly moan. 

“Grace...” he mewled. She grinned at him as he tightened his pelvis.

”Yes, dear?” She asked sweetly.

”Thank you. For this. For everything.”

”Of course.” 

She watched as his eyes slightly crossed in bliss as he finished. 

“Ah. There you are. Did that feel good?” She said, cuddling up against him.

”Better than I ever imagined. Can we do that again?” He said, kissing her forehead.

”Anytime, my love.”


End file.
